There comes a time in everyone's life when you feel a bit lonely. Sometimes loneliness brings crazy thoughts to the surface… crazy thoughts like will I end up being a spinster or a crazy cat lady. Okay the truth about me, one of my biggest fears is that will be me. I will be that crazy cat lady. Why? : A)Yes, I love cats. Always have, always will. B) I am about as single as they come. C) Not only am I single, but I am a serial single girl.
Okay I realize that first paragraph makes me seem pretty pathetic, so don't get the wrong impression here. I am not depressed or sitting in my bed crying at night...I am just expressing to you all how I feel on the occasion. I have a great group of friends that I love dearly. A wonderful family. An awesome group of co-workers. I live with 2 amazing roommates and their cat and a dog. I even usually have some sort of guy chasing after me. I am technically not alone. I have all of that but at the same time I am "alone".
Recently a major topic among myself and my single girlfriends has been our current boy craziness. We are just in that time in life when everyone our age is settling down. Our friend group is slowly turning into coupled entities, and besides all that we crave someone special to share our lives with too. We have been trying to figure out all the in's and out's of current relationships or the lack there of. We all have been in such sheer confusion about our serial singleness and unusual boy possibilities. (Even though I look at them and have no doubts because they are too awesome to end up alone). My group of friends happen to be some of the most well rounded people I know. Smart, fun, independent, a vast array of hobbies and interests, social, driven, cute, loyal, and have more love to give than imaginable. So why does no one jump on the band wagon for such amazing women?
The issue though isn’t what is wrong with us, I think it is how we go about men we are interested in. We were all women raised to go after what we want and we were told we can make anything happen if we put our minds to it. But maybe not in this case. The problem may actually be super simple: Guys go after what they want. And also men are born to respond to a challenge. Why else would guys love sports, and fights, and hunting. They like the challenge. Therefore with such a simple problem we also have a simple answer. Play hard to get.
This explains why inevitably the guys we aren’t interested in are always chasing after us - Because we don’t try. We don’t call them, drunk dial them, not attentive to their every want and need….we are completely indifferent. And the funny part is these guys still keep coming back and trying again.
Then on the other hand we rationalize and make excuse after excuse for the guys we like that end up rejecting us. We tell each other its fear of commitment, they are shy, lost our number... whatever. In turn to overcome these "excuses" maybe we make ourselves too available. We make it too easy. Men are the hunters, women are the gathers… If we take their hunt out of dating, maybe it just seems too easy to men. Even if the perfect woman is starring a man in the face, maybe men want to feel like they have earned a prize. So by golly, we will give them a chase because we deserve to find someone that will work hard to get us, that will want to claim us, that will love us. :o)
Bottom line, he's just not that into you if he is letting you slip away.
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