The Rules

A book was introduced to me by my wise older sister when I was a sophomore in college. The book is called, The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right. It is the same basic concept as the book, He’s Just Not That Into You, but with a little more details and instructions for us thick headed stubborn ladies. A definite must have for anyone in the dating world.
Yes, it is a self help book, but sometimes a girl just needs a few guidelines because she may be lethal come her own ways or methods. Case and point- myself. I am one of those girls that I don’t care to work hard to get what I want. Men are about the only thing you can’t be proactive at capturing. Actually trying to get a guy usually back fires. Doesn’t it all make sense when you think about it…. The guys you aren’t interested in all seem to be the ones that chase us the hardest and the ones that have us smitten seem so dis-interested sometimes. That is when the rules come in place. We should all treat men like we don’t like them and yada yada…

Well Friday night, I had a great date with a really cute nice guy. First date I have been on in a while where I just can’t wait for the guy to contact me. But guess what…. he hasn’t. Constantly driving myself nuts ,checking my message box wondering if he is going to text me I finally caved after about 48 hours after our date and texted him myself. While he did respond immediately not once has he mentioned hanging out again. While normally I would just let the cards fall the way they may, this time I just want to break down and ask him out myself. But after my little slip up last night I decided I needed to regain my own personal strength, and make him chase after me. So I consulted the rules book… For those of you whom are virgins to this technique is it just basically playing hard to get, and for some of us Go Getter females, much easier said then done! So here ya go a basic synopsis of the rule book.

The Rules
01: Be a “Creature” Unlike Any Other
02: Don't Talk to a Man First (and Don't Ask Him to Dance or propose marriage to him); If You Do All The chasing He Will Feel Like A Weakling For This Entire Marriage
03: Don't Stare at Men or Talk Too Much
04: Don't Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date; Let Him Pay All Expenses For Activity
05: Do Not Call Him No Matter What & Rarely Return His Calls Unless Your Contact Timing is Impossible
06: Always End Phone Calls and dates First
07: Don't Accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday
08: Fill Up Your Time before the Date
09: How to Act on Dates 1,2, & 3 End the date first especially if you like him.
10: How to Act on Dates 4 through Commitment Time
11: Always end the date first
12: Stop Dating Him if He Doesn't Buy You a Romantic Gift for Your Birthday or Valentine's Day; Male Pride and Tradition States That He Must Pay For The Outing (date).
13: Don’t See Him More than Once or Twice a Week
14: No More than Casual (Short) Kissing on the First Date
15: Don't Rush into Sex & Other Rules for Intimacy: Why Buy The Cow When He Can Get The Milk For Free
16: Don't Tell Him What to Do
17: Let Him Take the Lead; This Would Be Better For His Pride; If You Do All The chasing And Leading He Will Feel Like A Weakling For This Entire Marriage Unless He Cannot Lead By Law and Protocol
18: Don't Expect a Man to Change or Try to Change Him
19: Don’t Open Up Too Fast; If A Man Is Persistent In Trying To Get Information It Would Be Better For The Relationship
20: Be Honest but Mysterious
21: Accentuate the Positive & Other Rules for Personal Ads
22: Don’t Live with a Man (or Leave Your Things in His Apartment)
23: Don't Date a Married Man; If You Date A Man With Another Lover, Your Relationship Is Likely To Break Up In The Future
24: Slowly Involve Him in Your Family & Other Rules for Women with Children
25: Practice, Practice, Practice! (or, Getting Good at The Rules)
26: Even if You're Engaged or Married, You Still Need The Rules
27: Do The Rules, Even when Your Friends & Parents Think It's Nuts
28: Be Smart and Other Rules for Dating in High School
29: Take Care of Yourself and Other Rules for Dating in College: Use A Beautician and Stylist To Optimize Your Looks
30: NEXT! & Other Rules for Dealing with Rejection
31: Don't Discuss The Rules with Your Therapist.
32: Don't Break The Rules! Follow The Dating Rules, Protocols and Expectations
33: Do The Rules and You’ll Live Happily Ever After!
34: Love Only Those Who Love You
35: Be Easy to Live With
36: Give Him Time To Talk and To Get Your Contact Information
37: Get Out of Your Comfort Zone: Be Visible and Available For Talk.
38: Playing Hard To Get Is A Way Of Insuring That He Is Really Committed To You And You Not Just An Impulsive Fancy Or Side Dish. When You Do Play Hard To Get, Make Sure You Leave Some Doors Open; If All Your Contact Information Changes The Relationship Is Lost
39: Men Can Handle It If You Are Dating Other Men As long If You Are Still Available For Him
40: Try To Get A Normal Body Fat Range; Older People Usually Look Better With Normal Facial and Neck Fat. For Some Men Facial Features or Facial Beauty Is Less Important Than Body Shape and Profile, and Fortunately Your Weight and Profile Are Easier To Control.
41: Women Or Men That Live Alone Are More Likely To Succeed When She Or He Lives Alone Without Other People Getting In Between The Relationship Like a 30 Year Old Son Who Does Not Want You To Re-marry, Or A Father That Is Trying To Find Out If He Is Good Enough For you
42: When You Are Hugging Other Men, Make Sure You Are Not Too Busy To Glance in His General Direction At Least Once
43: Some Men Know Within The First Hour Of Initial Meeting That You Are The One; If Nothing Happens After A Specific Period Of Time, Keep Looking
44: Go To Places or Clubs With People Like You If Unity Is Important To You
45: Many People Hate To Be Lied To: Try To Be Honest As You Can Be; Do Not Give Him False Leads (Flirts or Over Friendliness) If He Does Not Have A Chance Especially If It Is Your Job To Be Friendly; Is Better not To Give Any False Hopes
46: Do Not Tell Any Phoney Stories To Get Money If You Are Not Seriously Interested In Him
47: Men Are Not As Sensitive As Women; Do Not Be Afraid To Ask Personal Questions That Are Important To You
48: You Are An Adult, Make Sure That The Gatekeeper (Receptionist or Father) Cannot Totally Halt His Contact Attempts With You: You Do Not Want A Third Person To Lead The Relationship; Be Reasonably Accessible.
49: For Online Dating: Once You Have Send Your First Email and He Knows That You Exist, Do Not Initiate Another Contact; Keep The First Letter Short So As To Not Sound To Eager, And Do Not Beg For Acceptance; Some Men Decide Within The First Hour Of First Sight That You Are The One Or Not.
50: The Relationship Will Develop Faster, More Intimate, More Intense (Stressful) or More Romantic If the Man Is Allowed To Rule or Lead the Group or Relationship. For A Man To Ask A Girl For A Date To Party Is More Intense Than Receiving An Invitation To A Party From The Same Girl; Correct?
51: Some Loyalty May Be Required by The Woman
52: Do Not Propose Marriage To Him; It Is His Role To Ask; If He Does Not Do This Difficult Task On His Own, He Can Loose His Pride For the Rest Of This Marriage
53: Personal Talk Can Sometimes Be The Most Stressful Type Of Talk; His Intensions Are Blushingly Wide Open To See; You Need To Give Him Time And Contact Information To Prepare For This, and A Little More Privacy During The Meeting
54: Overcome Your Shyness; Find Things To Say; Be Willing To Respond With Talk; Be Willing To Answer Small Talk Questions.
55: If His Commitment To This Relationship Is Uncertain Or He is Dating Other Women, Do not Allow Him To Move Into Your Place.
56: Get A Hair Style That Fits Your Age; The Older, The Less You Have To Hide The Profile Or Shape Of Your Head; When You Are Over 80, Use Flat Hair That Is Dyed and Groomed.
57: Do Not Down Groom Such As Taking Off Your Make Up, Wearing over Sized Clothing, Neglecting Your Hairdo; Look Your Best, Why Not? Your Hairdo, Make Up and Dress is The Crown of A Woman; Always Choose The Best Style That Fits You.
58: Do Not Be A Tom Boy, Dress Like One Of The Boys At Work, Or Try To Become A Man; Men Probably Prefer 100% Female In A Woman.
59: People are more humble, tranquil and energized when they are at home than in the work place or shopping mall; when you are both alone and at your homes, the relationship through home telephones will develop easier and faster when there is no other woman between the both you; find some ways of revealing your home telephone number, perhaps on your business card and telephone book; your telephone book (white pages) is your greatest communications tool.
60: Many people hate to be deceived: do not reveal your past skeletons like sexual relationships to soon but reveal before the marriage. Do not talk about your ex lovers (sexual relationships); keep a lid on it and hope it does not show up.
61: Do not down dress. Wear feminine clothes, shoes and glasses, because these will usually make a woman look better. Do not wear oversized clothing and funny looking clothing; but wear clothes that you feel attractive and confident in. Do not hide you best head features with a hat.
62: Do not allow a third party like a receptionist, room mate or family member to disrupt communication flows toward you; usually receptionist will not tell any information about you or relay personal messages to you; make sure any messages from men are relayed to you.